Need Some Advice Off The Normal Topic

[TONY FERGUSON]

Thanks I really appreciate the help and just talking about it has helped a little, I always think the worst I've heard so many horror stories about these family courts and how guys get screwed over. But I'm trying to stay positive as possible.i appreciate all the info and advice mate it honestly does mean alot just opening up about it as tbh I've just bottled alot up and made my self sick with worry.

It shows mate. That's why I implore you to go easy on yourself. Try not thinking about these other cases. You don't know all the facts about them and they have absolutely no bearing on your case. You wouldn't stop driving just because some people have been unfortunate and had fatal crashes and the same thing applies here.

If you find yourself thinking about it just dig deep and pull yourself out of it. You can do it. Always remember that we all go through difficult times in life its how we respond to them that makes the difference.

Try watching some inspirational videos or try keeping yourself busy with productive things that will enhance your life. Realise that no matter how bad you feel today and no matter how hopeless things seem things will always get better and one day you will be feeling on top of the world and none of this will matter.

You will have a future with your daughter and a great one too. Just remember that life throws things at us that we don't deserve. Life takes beautiful situations and turns them into hell on earth. No one escapes this fact.

Do what you know deep down you need to do.

 

[Dan71]

I'm not sure what you mean mate?
My solicotor is awaiting the outcome of the legal aid decision then we will be pushing for a court date as far as I'm aware.
I wasn't sure about any forms I could fill out ect myself, people just told me to get a solicitor asap.

As I said you can start the paperwork yourself rather then wait for legal aid decision that I can guarantee you won’t get. Your solicitor must have told you that you won’t get legal aid . Wasn’t you on here a year ago asking this same thing under a different name

 

[Anonymous]

As I said you can start the paperwork yourself rather then wait for legal aid decision that I can guarantee you won’t get. Your solicitor must have told you that you won’t get legal aid . Wasn’t you on here a year ago asking this same thing under a different name

No I wasn't on here a year ago pal,and it's my solicotor who's applied for legal aid, it's based on your income so I don't understand your thinking I'll definitely not get it.
He gave me the forms to fill out and apply it's income based and depends on your take home pay and outgoings to determine the application.buy thank you for the information on apply myself as it will be an option if as you say I may not get legal aid.
Does this option get it to court quicker

 

[JusJamin]

No I wasn't on here a year ago pal,and it's my solicotor who's applied for legal aid, it's based on your income so I don't understand your thinking I'll definitely not get it.
He gave me the forms to fill out and apply it's income based and depends on your take home pay and outgoings to determine the application.buy thank you for the information on apply myself as it will be an option if as you say I may not get legal aid.
Does this option get it to court quicker

You can request an emergency hearing but there has to be grounds for it. Otherwise, it just joins the queue unfortunately..

 

[Dan71]

No I wasn't on here a year ago pal,and it's my solicotor who's applied for legal aid, it's based on your income so I don't understand your thinking I'll definitely not get it.
He gave me the forms to fill out and apply it's income based and depends on your take home pay and outgoings to determine the application.buy thank you for the information on apply myself as it will be an option if as you say I may not get legal aid.
Does this option get it to court quicker

You only get legal aid for child matters if there is a care / supervision order. I tried in 2014 and I seriously doubt the government has found extra money in these times to start paying for it. Your solicitor would know this and unless your child has social services involved or is in care system you won’t get it.
As I said before go to your magistrate court and tell the clerk you want to apply for child access /visitation, they will give you the paperwork and you can get the ball rolling while you wait for your solicitor. I did it and saw a magistrate the same day who gave me an order, it won’t be a final order and can be challenged, but it may scare your ex into being amicable and start arranging things.

 

[Rob O’tren]

First step is to really analyze the situation objectively.
Why did you split?
What have you done that is negative and you have to be honest with yourself?
What has she done wrong?
Why are you in this situation?

Then approach it from a completely different point of view.
Make amends with your ex. Admit your mistakes. Forgive her mistakes. Put yourself out there vulnerable but honest. Try to come up with an agreement. You shouldn’t need to get to the point of being told you have to pay child allowance. Rather you should want to give as much as possible in order to support your daughter.

My first wife and I split in 2019. Sure we got back together in 2020 and sure there were some unpleasant moments. But we would never do anything to damage our daughter.

Before you read this and say “you haven’t got a fucking clue mate” let me stop you by saying. No I don’t, I have no clue about the situation you’re in. But I have had enough friends and clients go through this. The guy nearly always thinks he’s the victim and truth is yes once it goes through the courts you will be. The father gets screwed over pretty much every time. So what I am saying is own up for your mistakes, forgive hers, approach the situation with love for both your child and your ex. No matter what happened how bad she fucked you over. At the end of the day your child can be damaged for life and develop daddy issues (trust me so many female competitors have this issue the story nearly always goes like this. Dad and mum split as a child they weren’t able to be nice to each other. The child ends up feeling like their dad left them while simultaneously resenting the mother. It creates issues that never go away.)

It’s not about who’s right and who’s wrong it’s about the child. So try to do everything you can to bring peace between you and the woman that you obviously loved enough at one point to father a child with. It will take time especially depending on the actual real story (not your story not her story but the actual truth). But if you come at it with utmost patience, tears in your eyes (metaphorically if not physically), do everything you can for your daughter. Even if you can’t see her right now if you put all the effort you can into her in any way that you can. If you never fall into the trick women play where they push buttons to get a reaction. Best case scenario you two come to a good arrangement. Second best if you do everything like this the courts will be more in your favor at least compared to the alternative. Finally worst case scenario you don’t see your daughter for a while but man she’s going to miss her dad and if you just keep it totally positive she will seek you out as time goes by. Either her mum gives in and gives visitation or a few years go by and then it happens. But MOST importantly you avoid creating a daddy issue in your daughter which will fuck her for life. All efforts must go to avoid this happening!

As far as the steroids threat. Man you need to take an honest look at yourself. If you can’t do that then perhaps do a dose of heroic mushrooms blow your ego away and then look at this with a fresh perspective. If you can’t see that obviously you’ve acted in some way that is aggressive or negative which allows your ex to focus on the steroids. Then you’re the first problem you’ve got to solve. The problem is our egos are too strong. We want to be right we want the other one to be wrong. Guaranteed you’ve fucked up in the past admitting this and working on yourself is how you fix this. Like I said maybe it doesn’t work at all and she keeps you from seeing her for now. But time passes quickly be patient and show only positivity towards her and her mother! Don’t belittle her mother even if the mother is a complete psycho bitch and 90% in the wrong.

Longest post WR right here!

 

[Anonymous]

It shows mate. That's why I implore you to go easy on yourself. Try not thinking about these other cases. You don't know all the facts about them and they have absolutely no bearing on your case. You wouldn't stop driving just because some people have been unfortunate and had fatal crashes and the same thing applies here.

If you find yourself thinking about it just dig deep and pull yourself out of it. You can do it. Always remember that we all go through difficult times in life its how we respond to them that makes the difference.

Try watching some inspirational videos or try keeping yourself busy with productive things that will enhance your life. Realise that no matter how bad you feel today and no matter how hopeless things seem things will always get better and one day you will be feeling on top of the world and none of this will matter.

You will have a future with your daughter and a great one too. Just remember that life throws things at us that we don't deserve. Life takes beautiful situations and turns them into hell on earth. No one escapes this fact.

Do what you know deep down you need to do.

Thanks mate.

 

[Rob O’tren]

T Bone be arguing again

 

[Rob O’tren]

It shows mate. That's why I implore you to go easy on yourself. Try not thinking about these other cases. You don't know all the facts about them and they have absolutely no bearing on your case. You wouldn't stop driving just because some people have been unfortunate and had fatal crashes and the same thing applies here.

If you find yourself thinking about it just dig deep and pull yourself out of it. You can do it. Always remember that we all go through difficult times in life its how we respond to them that makes the difference.

Try watching some inspirational videos or try keeping yourself busy with productive things that will enhance your life. Realise that no matter how bad you feel today and no matter how hopeless things seem things will always get better and one day you will be feeling on top of the world and none of this will matter.

You will have a future with your daughter and a great one too. Just remember that life throws things at us that we don't deserve. Life takes beautiful situations and turns them into hell on earth. No one escapes this fact.

Do what you know deep down you need to do.

Cringe fest.

 

[Dan71]

W

Cringe fest.

Well apparently watching rocky movies for motivation is the way to deal with child custody matters according to Tony and amazingly he got a like for it lol

 

[Rob O’tren]

W

Well apparently watching rocky movies for motivation is the way to deal with child custody matters according to Tony and amazingly he got a like for it lol

I personally think the OP should recite the Rocky quote in court and see if they agree

 

[pooley1810]

W

Well apparently watching rocky movies for motivation is the way to deal with child custody matters according to Tony and amazingly he got a like for it lol

I noticed the time of your post
I'm assuming you've been watching the game
What was the score in the end?

 

[TONY FERGUSON]

Cringe fest.

What's cringe is you spamming TF out of this thread when a brother clearly needs some support.

Show some respect and meet me in the other thread if you want yet another shakedown.

 

[TONY FERGUSON]

W

Well apparently watching rocky movies for motivation is the way to deal with child custody matters according to Tony and amazingly he got a like for it lol

The fact your ex got a like for throwing herself out of a two storey window seems a lot more amazing to me.

Mind you the judge did have the misfortune of meeting you in person so was probably curious why she didn't choose the fourth storey..

 

[Rob O’tren]

What's cringe is you spamming TF out of this thread when a brother clearly needs some support.

Show some respect and meet me in the other thread if you want yet another shakedown.

Come on Tony. He needs a barrister not cringe worthy pep talks from Sylvester Stallone ffs